Recap/Review: Real Housewives of New Jersey - "Drop Dead Gorgas"

Airdate: Monday, May 23, 2011, 9:00 pm ET/PT on Bravo

Rating: ★★★★★

Note: For simplicity purposes and to clarify the difference between the two Joes on the show, I’ll be referring to Joe Gorga as Joey G or Joey, and Joe Giudice as Joe G or Joe.

Recap/Review: Real Housewives of New Jersey - "Drop Dead Gorgas" 1

Pictured: (l-r) Jacqueline Laurita, Teresa Giudice, Caroline Manzo, Kathy Wakile, Melissa Gorga -- Photo by: Tommy Garcia/Bravo

So it seems a little strange the housewives are celebrating Halloween. Hello? It’s not even summer yet, officially. I guess it has to do with scheduling. Whatever… But this episode is more about what went down at last week’s christening.

It’s Halloween and everyone is in costume. Melissa is beautiful in her sexy cat suit, while Joey G is quite the opposite, dressed in a gold mini halter dress, with balls for boobs, and a Snookie wig. Can you believe how funny he looks!!? They’re going to a party with the two Kims at Club 466, a very hot North Jersey club known for its guido and guidette customers. I wonder what all the guidos think of Joey dressed as a woman. I think he has a wonderful sense of humor to do that. And yes, troublemaker Kim G is back this season and already she’s wreaking havoc! I’ve never seen such a media hungry woman!

Teresa is dressed as “Super T,” the mom who does it all, complete with cape that two of her girls hold while she’s running around the room. Teresa certainly likes herself, doesn’t she? Three of her girls are dressed as rockstars, with baby Audriana dressed as a gym coach. Hubby Joe G is wearing a smoking jacket, requisite pipe in mouth. I suppose he’s trying to play the rich snobby guy, which is the furthest thing from the truth. Now that I think about it, both of their costumes are the furthest from the truth! They’re having a party at the house for 20 kids. I want to strangle Gia. She is such a brat! She always wants to have her way, and Teresa doesn’t seem to have any control over her, or maybe she just doesn’t care. For instance, when Teresa tells Gia she doesn’t need to be holding the pumpkin in the picture they’re having taken, Gia just drops it. Boom! Right on the floor in front of her instead of putting it down on a counter somewhere. I swear, I would have swatted my kid’s bottom had she done that to me. But I’m old-fashioned I guess. In voice-over, Teresa says, “I wish that my brother would come be with us ‘cause you know, you can’t change the past, but you can make the future better.” That’s true Teresa, so why don’t you be the big sister and take the first step?

As everyone gathers at Jackie Laurita’s house to carve pumpkins, family friend Dolores asks Teresa about what happened at her nephew’s christening. As Teresa is explaining, Caroline steps in, wanting to know what she’s going to do about the Posche Fashion Show at the Brownstone in a few days, since Teresa, Jackie and Melissa will be walking the runway together. I know Caroline means well, but sometimes it annoys me when she sticks her nose into everyone’s business. Granted, Teresa is a little naïve when she says she’ll “just hide” at the event. You have to deal with family problems when they happen.

After the christening, cousin Kathy invites Melissa and Joey G to dinner. She felt bad about what happened and wants to lend a friendly ear. Joey reveals it all has to do with Joe G’s relationship with his father, and the lack of respect he feels Teresa has for him. Kathy also inquires about the upcoming fashion show. Seems both sides of this family want Teresa and her brother to work it out.

How coincidental is it that Kim G runs into Kathy and Melissa at Posche, Kim D’s store, the sponsor of the fashion show? Needless to say, Kim G, who isn’t a fan of Teresa’s, which delights Melissa, immediately wants to know what happened at the christening. It’s obvious Kathy and Melissa don’t want to gossip, but that’s what Kim G lives for. And let’s not forget Kim G has the habit of changing horses mid-stream. As does Kim D. Remember when she was Danielle’s friend last year and then unfriended her? With friends like that, who needs enemies?!!

Caroline visits Face, daughter Lauren’s new business—a beauty bar inside the Chateau, a hair and nail salon. I think Lauren’s statement about the Posche show, “I think it’ll be fine. I don’t think it’ll be any kind of drama or people trying to start drama,” is not a foreshadowing of things to come. I think the exact opposite is going to happen. Caroline didn’t go to last year’s show because of the drama with Danielle Staub, but this year, she’s going to support both her husband’s business (the show is at the Mansion), and Lauren’s, since she’s going to be doing the makeup for the show. Don’t you just love the closeness of the Manzo family? It’s nice when your spouse/mother supports you like that. Not everyone is that lucky.

It seems everyone is concerned, talking about what’s going to happen at the fashion show; Teresa goes to Jackie’s for a drink to settle her nerves and chat about the fashion show; Kim G goes to the Halloween party at the club to do the same; and Kathy and Melissa talk things over while getting their hair done. Kathy plans to talk with Teresa at the show in an effort to fix things between the two families. Kathy’s a nice lady, but something tells me that’s not a smart move. But who am I to say? As Melissa expects, Teresa merely says, “Hi, how are you?” when she walks in.

I have to say how pretty everyone walking the runway looks and the clothes are just fab if you’re into that style. (Read sarcastic.) Melissa’s strut…um walk, however, is slightly over the top. Caroline pretty much says it all when she comments how fake she thinks Teresa’s smile is. I agree, she’s smiling but it doesn’t quite reach her eyes. With everything that went down at the christening, all the fake “hi-how-are-you’s” are disgusting. “Everybody’s acting like nothing happened…in my head, I’m like tick, tick, tick, tick,” comments Jackie and you just know something bad is on the horizon. And that’s when Kathy approaches Teresa, “I just wanted to know, what’s going on with you? What’s up?” I know Kathy thinks she’s going to do some good with this conversation, but she comes off as accusatory – as if the whole thing was Teresa’s fault! Umm, Kathy was sitting at the table when Joey G went off on Teresa, and she wants Teresa to apologize?! No way! However, and that’s a big however, Teresa is totally in the wrong when she refuses to acknowledge that Kathy took Audriana out of the room when the punches started flying. As a matter of fact, Teresa becomes so angry with Kathy about that, she spews “Do not go there. And you know what? I’m done with you. Done, done, done!” Teresa thinks Kathy is accusing her of being a bad mother, but she’s not. She’s only stating a truth Teresa obviously doesn’t remember.

Caroline, always the voice of reason, is so right to step in and put a stop to this ridiculousness. To Melissa, “You’re family, fix it…it’s none of my business. I don’t want to see this. Kill each other in your own home, I don’t care. It’s none of our business. Good night. OK?”

Tune in to Real Housewives of New Jersey next Monday at 9 pm ET/PT on Bravo for “Sealed with a Diss,” where Teresa attempts a reconciliation with Melissa, and Kathy defends herself in a conversation with Caroline. Oh goody, more drama!

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Linda

Love TV, movies, and books--mostly mysteries, with a good love story thrown in every now and then. I have four adopted dogs who I adore. I love trying new recipes, and enjoy eating what I make. English language perfectionist. Reading in bed, Italian food, warm weather, the beach, all types of games = favs!